The following is a paraphrased quote from Ajahn Sumedho’s booklet, The Way It
Is.
“The idea of becoming a Buddha is based on conditions – you think you’re
someone who isn’t a Buddha right now, and in order to become a Buddha, you
have to work really hard to get rid of those qualities which are not Buddha-like
(since) you are far from perfect. You get angry, greedy, doubtful and frightened,
and of course, Buddhas don’t have this because a Buddha knows better. So you
have to get rid of those unBuddha-like things and try to get Buddha-like qualities
such as compassion.
And all these ideas are just creations of the mind! So we create “Buddhas” because
we believe in the creations of the mind. But they aren’t real Buddhas. They’re only
false Buddhas. They’re not wisdom Buddhas; they are just conditions of our mind.
As long as you conceive yourself as being somebody who has to do something in
order to become something else, you still get caught in a trap, a condition of mind
as being a self, and you will never quite understand anything properly.
But if instead you begin to see that whatever you are experiencing is a changing
condition and not “self,” you’re seeing from the perspective of being Buddha,
rather than doing something in order to become a Buddha.”
(End Quote)
So why work with the mind at all? Why not just be present with all that flows
through the mind merely acknowledging our inherent freedom, and living from
that place of awareness? If you are truly able to fully surrender to life without
grasping or rejecting whatever arises, then it is true that nothing more needs to be
“done.”
For most of us, however, we need to work to release our attachment to various
gross and subtle forms of identification. Of course, even this work is selfless in that
our intention to engage in this work and our efforts to do so arise to consciousness
according to various causes and conditions.
Let’s begin our journey together by working with resentment. Of course it is
possible, or even likely, that you have already worked through this form of selfing.
If so, please feel free to share these ideas with others you know who may still be
working on this issue.
RESENTMENT
By all accounts, maintaining resentment towards others is the greatest barrier to
spiritual realization. It acts as a ceiling that prevents us from seeing things the way
they really are (dwelling in Dhamma). Those who have been meditating for years
and have made little progress may actually be tangled in a web of resentments
which prevent them from accessing deeper levels of awareness.
In the past we may have been hurt, betrayed, or abandoned by those in whom we
have placed our trust. We may have been abused physically, sexually, verbally, or
emotionally. We may have been made to feel small and worthless. However, no
matter how much pain we have experienced in the hands of another, maintaining
resentment will not change what occurred. Others may have victimized us in the
past, but by harboring feelings of resentment towards others, we become victims of
our own unskillful mind states.
The key to letting go of our resentment is to cultivate forgiveness. We need to
forgive ourselves as well as others whom we feel have hurt us in some significant
way. We need to forgive life for being the way it is. We need to give up all hope
for a better past. The following is a forgiveness contemplation that can be used on
a daily basis for the next two weeks. Please practice this contemplation.
FORGIVENESS
Gently close your eyes and begin to breathe through your nose. Place your
attention on the sensation the breath creates as it moves in and out of your nostrils
by the tip of the nose. Stay with this sensation until the mind begins to calm down
and you feel more at peace.
Consider yourself to be your own best friend, and let feelings of friendship towards
yourself arise in your heart. This friendship expresses itself by being caring, kind,
loving, and patient with yourself.
Let the feelings of friendship towards yourself pervade you from head to toe so
you can feel the warmth of your friendship. Take some time to notice this.
Begin a mental review of your life and forgive yourself for anything you feel you
have done that has created pain for yourself or for anyone else that you have been
in a relationship with. Take your time going through this process.
Think of your loved ones, those individuals who are closest to you. It can be your
family members or your friends. Imagine the feelings of friendship that you now
feel towards yourself extending out from your heart and touching the hearts of your
loved ones. Let them know that you are there for them if they need you.
Review these relationships and forgive those for any abuse you may have felt as a
consequence of their actions. Take your time going through this process.
Think of those you dislike or feel aversion towards. It may be someone from your
past who abused you in some way, or someone with whom you are currently
having difficulty. These people also wish for peace and happiness in their lives.
We cannot live with an open, caring, loving, and trusting heart as long as our heart
is closed to even one person.
Imagine the feelings of friendship that you now feel towards yourself and your
loved ones extending out from your heart in waves, and touching the hearts of
those with whom you still have issues.
Review these relationships and forgive these individuals for any abuse you may
have felt as a consequence of their actions. Take your time going through this
process.
It may not immediately stop the hurt we feel, and this process will not
automatically prevent anyone from repeating the same unskillful behaviors.
However, it offers us the possibility of living with a deep inner peace even in the
midst of a world filled with turmoil and hatred..
Now imagine that your heart is expanding. As it opens, allow all the people in your
life to enter your heart and feel the presence of your love, forgiveness, and
friendship.
Continue to open your heart as much as possible. As it continues to open, let in as
many people in the world as you can. Experience the great joy and peace from
having feelings of forgiveness and friendship toward everyone.
