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29. Mindfulness of Feelings #2

Reiterating  from last month, recall the definition of the word “feelings” as it is used in this Sutta. In Pali (the language of the Buddhist suttas) “feelings” are not emotions, which is how we traditionally use the word feelings here in the west. (We will work with emotions in the Third Foundation of Mindfulness.) Feelings reflect the quality of each sense experiences as having the quality of being pleasant, unpleasant or neutral.

 

Our practice is to pay bare attention to the feelings (directly “cognizing” or “knowing” with our direct experience) that are arising to consciousness – we are to observe them without judgment, decision, or commentary. We are not contemplating in the cognitive (thinking) sense. We simply want to directly realize the impermanent, unsatisfactory, and selfless nature of the feelings that are arising. They just arise! It’s very simple!

 

When we investigate feelings we are not interested in how the body is affected by feelings, or what our thoughts are concerning the feelings that are arising. We want to merely investigate the feelings (the physical sensation) without any other aspect of our experience modifying, influencing, or distorting what is occurring.

 

Although feelings automatically arise whenever there is sense contact (or thought), the type of feeling that we experience can be influenced by our perception of the sense object being experienced (which can change depending on the circumstances). It is important to see how our perceptions can influence our feelings.

 

Sometimes the perceptions come in the form of a thought which merely labels the experience after memory is accessed, and sometimes in the form of a judgment about the sense experience itself. Our overall mood can also alter how we experience the sense contact.  

 

Throughout the next week, observe the feelings that are coming through the six sense doors in order to determine which are arising as a result of your perception (influenced by your memory) of the sense experiences, rather than coming directly from the experiences themselves. This is an important bridge to the next meditation which follows.  

 

SATIPATTHANA SUTRA

MINDFULNESS OF FEELINGS #3

 

We have seen that at every moment of experience feelings arise, the quality of these feelings are beyond our control, and they arise directly from sense contact and be influenced by perceptions (our memory).

 

As a result of these feelings craving/aversion arises in the mind.

 

Sometimes it can be craving to continue a pleasant feeling or to continue experiencing the sense object that is providing those pleasant feelings. At other times it can be craving to end the unpleasant feelings or to discontinue experiencing the sense object that is providing those unpleasant feelings.

 

When we react to feelings by craving we are reinforcing the illusion that we are in control of the type of feelings that we experience, that we can sustain or end feelings through an act of will, and that there is a self that is experiencing the feelings that are arising. “Who else could be having so much fun or be so miserable?”.

 

There are several key meditations to help recognize how we react to feelings, to see the true nature of feelings, to stop our conditioned response to feelings, and to discover that there is no one who feels.  

 

1st Exercise -How feelings condition craving

 

While sitting for meditation and throughout the course of the day, closely examine what reactions occur as a consequence of the feelings that arise. It does not matter whether the feelings came directly from a sense object or as a consequence of a perceptual overlay.

 

Work to recognize the ways in which craving occurs.

 

Do you feel it in your body as contraction as a result of unpleasant feelings, as increased energy as a result of pleasant feelings, or as a feeling of dullness as a result of neutral feelings?

 

Do you experience it in the mind as an excitement as a result of pleasant feelings, as a turning away or resistance to facing unpleasant objects (including thoughts and emotions) or feelings, or as boredom or sadness as a result of neutral feelings?

 

What is the direct experience when equanimity is the feeling being experienced?

 

An example:  One example could be if you notice the “feeling” of craving for a particular item when you see it in a store. We have the experience of “craving” because we have a perception of the item as desirable (you can transfer this to any other “item” you may “want”). Then if you resist the urge to buy and return sometime later you may notice the “desire” for that item has disappeared. Have you ever noticed what the absence of the desire feels like? It probably has the feeling of equanimity- in some ways quite peaceful. We often don’t take the time notice the peace of equanimity in our rush to experience only what is the next pleasant experience!

 

Please be careful not to judge either the feelings themselves, the tendency to crave, the intention to crave, or the craving itself. We merely want to become aware of how craving manifests as a result of feelings. We have quite enough judges in this world!

 

The impermanent nature of feelings – Please consider the following carefully:

 

At this crucial juncture in our practice, we want to skillfully break the conditioned reaction to feelings, and see them for what they really are – impermanent and impersonal phenomena that rise and fall based upon causes and conditions. By doing so, we break the conditioned chain of events that perpetuate the illusion of a separate “self” as part of, behind, or in control of the feeling process.  This process brings us one step closer to freedom.  

2nd Exercise:  Sitting Practice – Unpleasant Feeling

 

After sitting in meditation for an extended period of time, bodily pain (unpleasant feelings) may begin to arise. The first strategy is to watch the rise and fall of the unpleasant feeling and return to the breath. However, if the feeling is very intense, we will find it difficult to stay with our breath. When this occurs, we begin to use the unpleasant feelings as the primary object of our meditation.

 

Instead of the common reaction of shifting our posture as a way to get rid of the feeling, or of experiencing aversion for the unpleasant feeling, we want to fully “open” to the feeling. By doing so, we can avoid any conditioned reactivity and gain insight into the impermanent nature of the experience.

 

We need to relax, soften, and settle into the painful feeling. We need to become so intimate with the feeling that we can penetrate our misperceptions regarding pain, and see it for what it really is – just an impermanent experience that rises and falls based upon causes and conditions.

 

By doing so we will discover that there is no pain in the knee, back or any other pin point location. The exact place that we feel the pain actually keeps shifting from moment to moment.

 

Further, if we are very attentive to the feelings, we realize that between every pulsation of pain, there is the absence of pain.

 

We will also find that the quality of the pain keeps changing. We may first experience the sensation as burning, then as pressure, as throbbing, as aching, and so forth. If we are able to remain fully present with the unpleasant feeling, it often reaches a point where it breaks up and completely disappears, showing once again its impermanence. If the pain continues we then deliberately notice an “intention” to move. Then we slowly initiate the movement to relieve the pain. Now, notice the absence of pain (pleasant, or possible neutral- but still a relief) now we continue our sitting.

 

This same practice can be applied to unpleasant feelings generated by the mind. For example, you may have a memory of a recent argument arise to consciousness. This may be the cause of unpleasant mental feelings. If you cannot simply observe the thought process and go back to your breath because of the intensity of the unpleasant mental feeling, then use that unpleasant feeling in the same way as described above to see its impermanent and conditioned nature.  Unpleasant thoughts (emotions) manifest physically in the body. From your own direct experience explore the ways your emotions manifest.

 

Sitting Practice – Pleasant Feelings

 

We already know the unsatisfactory nature of unpleasant feelings. What about pleasant ones?

 

If during meditation a pleasant body or mental feeling arises and we stay present with that feeling, we can see it change to a neutral or unpleasant one. This experience teaches us that even pleasant feelings are unsatisfactory. That is, they cannot provide a lasting sense of pleasure. Further, the temporary pleasure it may provide is a significant cause of the craving that ultimately leads to further suffering.  

 

3rd Exercise: Daily Life Practice

Throughout your day, whenever an experience or thought arises and your attention is called to a feeling, become mindful of that feeling (you can even say to yourself “This is unpleasant, pleasant, neither”) and witness its impermanent nature. This would be followed by going back to whatever activity you were engaged in. If the feeling is intense, you would momentarily shift your focus to that feeling (depending on the appropriateness of the circumstances), and stay with it until you were able to determine its true characteristics.  

 

Please remember that in deep practice it is not the mind (in this case feelings) that we are trying to change. It is our relationship to mind that changes.